What happened last night?
by Jadeah
Summary: After one hell of a night, it leaves Soap, Price, Ghost, ROach, and Meat wondering what had truely happened.


Okay to make my point here, nothing I really say here is true about the characters. So don't judge.  
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Soap woke up to find himself on the floor, staring up at the ceiling of his room. Looking around he scanned the room, and found his Ghost literally on the ceiling! For a moment he tried to remember what had happened, but he came up short. "G-Ghost?" He croaked in a hoarse voice.

The lieutenant blinked his eyes open slowly and then immediately saw his Captain, "How'd you get up there, sir?"

Soap blinked a moment, then realized it wasn't Ghost on ceiling, he was. And his limps were duck taped there. "I don't remember." He groaned. "What the hell happened last night?"

Ghost thought for a moment, "I think it had something to do with Meat bringing beer in here or something. I don't exactly know."

They both heard someone snore and they looked to Roach, who was coming to, holding his head to ease a headache. And it dawned on him that Roach was also missing his pants. Soap scanned the room a little more to see Price sacked out on the top bunk nearby, grumbling in his sleep. But also, next to Roach laid Meat, same as Roach, he too was missing his trousers.

"Meat? Meat! What happened last night!" Soap demanded at the groggy man.

Meat blinked hazily at the Captain, "Whoa! How'd you get up there? I wanna be Spider man!"

"Not now Meat," Soap hissed. "What happened last night?"

Meat thought for a long few seconds and proclaimed, "I came in here with some hard liquor and we had a huge drinking contest."

"Yes, well anything else?" Soap questioned.

"You know what? I have no idea." Meat sighed. Then his attention diverted to Roach. "Hey Roach you know what happened last night?"

Roach groaned, "Ugh, my ass hurts."

It didn't truly take a genius to put two and two together. Ghost then chuckled, "You have fun with the bug last night? That nickname really suits you."

Meat groaned then sighed. But rubbed his rear as well, "Damn it Roach, you and your battle for the top."

Price finally got up and looked at everyone, "I have a few questions. 1) Soap how the bloody hell did you get on the ceiling? 2) What the fuck happened last night?"

"We were asking the same question, old man." Soap grumbled. "Now could someone get me down from here?"

Price sighed and worked on peeling the tape off the ceiling without ripping paint. After one of MacTavish's ankles were undone, the rest just fell on its own. So he crashed down on the wood floor with a thud. As he laid on his back for a long few seconds he listened to Meat and Roach argue about who should of been on top the whole time, and Ghost mutter to himself.

When he got back up to a sit, he said in irritation, "Look, we don't know. Now why not we ask someone who could've heard what happened."

"That has got to be a better idea," Ghost agreed and stood up, helping his Captain to his feet. Meat and Roach also got up and Price slipped off the bunk.

"You two might wanna get something to cover your, er, you know." Soap told them before going with Ghost and Price. So Meat and Roach found their pants and followed.

Just down the hall, they found Shepard who was knocked out on the floor with an empty beer bottle and his fly down. Roach and Meat exchanged glances and Meat kicked one of the General's limp hands, "Should we be worried?"

Ghost sighed, "I'll be back." Then he left down the hall back to the room. Soon returning with a blow horn and earplugs. He pressed the button on the blowhorn right next to Shepard's face, causing the older man to jump up and punch the closest person.

"What the fuck?" He exclaimed when he realized that he just socked Roach in the eye.

"General Shepard, do you remember what happened last night?" Soap asked him.

The man blinked and groaned to himself about how sore his back was. "I have the foggiest idea what you're talking about."

"We could check the security camera feeds," Ghost reminded.

So they did, all running stiffly to the security room, Ghost worked the computer a moment and found the file. And they watched as Meat came in waving a bunch of beer around, challenging them to a drinking contest. Soon it stepped up to Ghost and Price climbing up on the bunk beds and taping Soap to the ceiling. And just after that, Shepard came in. Meat was still drinking, but Shepard took an interest Roach. Minutes later he was screwing the Sergeant.

"Oh that's why my ass hurts!" Roach snapped. And he glared at the General angrily.

The Shepard shrugged and reminded, "I was drunk too. So this means nothing."

A few more moments later, he finished up with Roach and worked on Meat in the video feed.

"And mine!" Meat shouted.

"I WAS DRUNK DAMMIT!" Shepard reminded.

"But you still screwed two men last night." Soap teased.

"Well I don't see a struggle," Ghost told him.

As the video continued, they watched as soon Roach passed out in the corner with no pants on, and Meat crawled over to Roach, passing out with his head in the Sergeant's lap. Shepard grabbed a bottle and ran out screaming like an idiot, causing all the men to laugh seeing this. Price soon drank the last of a different beer and passed out, Ghost fell on the floor from his bunk, also falling unconscious. And that left Soap to hang there, and soon pass out as well.

"What the fuck," Meat said slowly.

"Shepard, you're a sex maniac." Roach remarked.

"For the last time, I was drunk!" Shepard protested.

"Wanker," Ghost grumbled. "Sorry for hanging you on the ceiling, sir."

"Yeah, I guess I should be too," Price sighed.

"Doesn't matter to me at the moment, we were all buzzed." Soap told them.

"That's a real understatement, Captain." Meat told him. "And I guess I'm sorry for getting us all drunk in the first place."

"How did you get beer in the first place?" Shepard questioned.

Meat ran out screaming, "I KNOW A GUY!"


End file.
